My Process of Conscious Transformation

I talk a lot about the importance of the process - in art, in mental health, in everything. You have to trust the process and let it lead you in your journey of consciously transforming. I believe there is power in sharing our stories and who we are with one another, so here’s mine:

Hi, I’m Liz. I’m an artist and designer living, looking, and making in sunny Los Angeles, CA. My mission is to help the world become more whole, healed, and well, and this mission started with me.

THE PROCESS, NOT THE PRODUCT

I am a process-driven artist, meaning that procedure, actions, and intentions are central to how I work, as opposed to the end product. I rarely start a project with a clear idea of what the result will be. Instead, I allow the materials, concept, and emotion to guide me.

I work in a variety of mediums from collage to painting and drawing to typography. For me, creating art is an intentional practice of joy. I breathe life into my work with expressive visuals featuring hand drawn type, vibrant colors, and found imagery.

I live just as bold and colorful as my aesthetic. When I’m not working or writing, you can find me enjoying a good book on my balcony (soaking up the California sun), cooking up a new flavor-packed recipe or diving into one of my many other personal projects (currently it’s composting!). Curiosity and play drive my studio time. You never know what I might be getting into, but one thing you can count on is that I am moving and grooving to my favorite tunes and investing in my joy!

BECOMING A CREATIVE

I was encouraged to connect with creativity from an early age. For nearly as long as I’ve been making, I have struggled with depression and anxiety due to growing up in a chaotic environment. Art was the one constant in my life keeping me grounded which is what led me to pursue a degree in art and design.

College was a big coming of age time for me. I developed my art, experimented, and learned a lot. My projects acted as a form of therapy to explore my identity and feelings of fragmentation. During this time, I was living with predictable seasons of depression which always happened to hit at the busiest (most stressful) times of the semester - around midterms and finals. I also struggled to make friends for the first couple of years because of social anxiety.

After college, I started my first job. There were no busy “seasons” - it was busy all year round - and my health began to worsen. I fell into a deep depression and developed several health issues both physical (chronic body pain and fatigue) and mental (feelings of hypervigilance and disconnection). Numbing habits (drinking and smoking weed) as well as avoidance patterns (tv escapism) began to take over my life. On top of all of that, I totally lost my art practice.

It took me a few years to realize that I wasn’t living a life that worked for me. I set off on a journey to pivot my life to something that didn’t leave me feeling like a shell of a person. I decided that I wanted to change the story I’d been telling myself - that my mental health, my pain, my past, and my suffering controlled my life. Instead, I opened myself up to believing in the possibility of change; to believing that I had the power and autonomy to make things better. 

The first thing I did was get back to my art practice. I used my art to heal and come back to myself, and continue to do so each day. Creativity is a powerful, healing energy source that helps us connect to who we are, to the present moment, to hope. My art not only gave me an expressive outlet for all the emotions, but it also gave me the imagination to envision a different future.

CONSCIOUSLY TRANSFORMING

As 2019 came to a close, I was nearing a decade of pursuing my own healing. I made great improvements in my health over the years, and had been living depression free for longer than I’d ever experienced. I was feeling much more stable in my health, although chronic body pain continued to affect my daily life.

Reading The Transformation by James S. Gordon, MD brought me to the realization that what happened to me growing up was trauma that still deeply affected me. This crucial piece of the puzzle created connections between all of my health issues which started a chain reaction in  discovering a much better and deeper understanding of how my health was impacted by unacknowledged trauma.

2020 brought with it a lot of crises as well as answers and resolutions. The added stress of a global pandemic on top of recognizing and reconciling the impact trauma had on my life was too much for me to handle. By the summer, my anxiety and depression were at an all-time high, eventually making it difficult for me to function and maintain my job responsibilities. I’d never experienced anything like it as I’m typically overly self sufficient. 

It was scary to feel so helpless, but I’m glad that it came to that point. It forced me to go back to therapy, and this time I found someone who focused on trauma. With her help and support, I was able to make sense of things that happened in my past and find my way back out of the darkness. In September, I received a PTSD diagnosis, and as much as it might sound like bad news, it wasn’t. The diagnosis validated my experiences. It was such a relief to finally have the answers that I’d been seeking for so long!

WHAT IT’S ALL ABOUT

2020 was the year that I launched my blog, Consciously Transforming. On the blog, you can find ideas, practices, and tools to help you find empowerment and self-discovery through creative living + healing. I approach personal growth the same as my creative practice - by trusting the process and unfolding myself one day at a time. I believe that we can find wisdom in the processes all around us. As we grow and learn, there are lessons everywhere, in mundane everyday moments, if we are willing to look for them. We can discover healing by designing a morning routine, by taking care of plants, by being with ourselves through crisis, and by investing time in creative projects. 

I also officially launched my shop: Goods for Vibrant Living. I’m currently selling art prints, paintings, and plant care products, and I have a lot of plans for expansion. My vision for the shop is to house products and tools to aid you on your own journey of consciously transforming. I’m developing my product line based on what helped me to stay inspired and build resilience. New products coming soon include: journals, stickers, prayer candles, and more.

NOW IT’S YOUR TURN!

Making an intentional decision to pursue healing and change your life for the better is a choice you have to make every day. I don’t always succeed, but there are no steps backwards. Sometimes you have to get a little lost before you’re ready to be found, and each step you take is moving you toward the person you want to be.

Now that I have started coaching, I’m so excited to help you grow. With all the tools, resources, support, and guidance I have gained during the decade of my own healing, I’m here to support you and catalyze your journey!

I’m offering a special highly discounted offer to anyone who is ready to make this change. If that sounds like you, email me with the subject line “I’m Ready!” for a discount on your first three months of coaching with me. Let’s co-create a life that you love and feel inspired by!