7 Tips for Deepening Your Meditation Practice

Meditation is a challenging practice. With the fast pace of our modern society where instant gratification is valued, trends change by the day, and being stressed and overworked is worn as a badge of honor, it can be quite a challenge to simply sit still.

Most of us know or have heard of how beneficial meditation can be for our mental health, physical health, and overall well-being. But simply knowing the benefits of a practice doesn't mean that it's easy to make it into a habit.

The Problem of Monkey Mind

When we try to sit still and rest or meditate, we are met with the monkey mind—an ego-driven voice in our head. An overactive monkey mind is a symptom of our society that so many people struggle with, so if you’ve found meditation challenging as a result, know that you’re not alone. 

When I first started meditating, getting past the monkey mind into rest and meditation was an obstacle. Monkey mind is activated more when we’re stressed, burnt out, or feeling intense emotions like fear. It’s typically more active for those of us with anxiety, depression, or trauma. There are still days when my monkey mind is super active and makes it difficult to surrender into meditation. 

Another reason so many of us have difficulty detaching from our thoughts is that we live in a patriarchal, hyper-masculine energy culture. Our culture values the mind over the body. In our society, rational, linear thought is king. We think and then do in order to get or receive. We believe that we can think ourselves into being healed. But our bodies have innate wisdom to heal (something I’ll be diving into more in an upcoming blog).

It took me a really long time to make meditation into a habit. It was on my New Year's resolutions for close to three years before I actually made it into a consistent practice. Now that I’ve learned how to get past monkey mind and really settle into deep meditation, I want to share seven tips with you that really helped me with my own meditation practice.

1. Use a Focal Technique

If you have an overactive monkey mind, then simply sitting and trying to detach from your thoughts can be more stressful than relaxing. Meditation isn't a practice of not thinking, but it is a practice of choosing where your attention goes. So use a focal technique to tell your mind where you want it to go rather than allowing it to follow your stream of consciousness.

A mantra is a simple focal technique where you repeat a word or phrase throughout the meditation. The word mantra comes from 2 Sanskirt words meaning “mind vehicle.” Through repetition, the focus on your mantra carries your mind away. 

The “soft belly” mantra is a mantra that I found worked great for me starting out. Using this mantra was the first time I was able to meditate unguided for 20 minutes. For this technique, say internally “soft” as you inhale. On the exhale, say internally “belly.” The phrase reminds you to breathe soft and big into the belly so it basically combines both a mantra and using the breath as a focal point.

2. Start with Breathwork

More than simply just tuning in to your breath, Breathwork—the manipulation of inhales and exhales into patterns—is a powerful tool to use at the beginning of your meditation practice. Certain pranayama techniques (breathwork of the yogic tradition) stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system, which means they help your body move into relaxation. This can help you settle into your meditation practice and reach deeper states of consciousness. 

Many beginner meditators don't latch onto the habit of meditation because they are unable to reach a deeper state of consciousness, so they're not actually feeling the benefits, the bliss, the peace that meditation provides. Breathwork is basically a shortcut to getting more relaxed so that you can experience deeper meditation. 

3. Try Lying Down

Back when I first started meditating, every guided meditation would start with the teacher saying “sit up tall.” The problem was, I could never comfortably sit through an entire meditation! I was living with chronic body pain that was incredibly difficult to not focus on while sitting. It wasn't until I realized I could lay down that I was able to meditate more consistently and for longer. Lying down allowed me to fully relax since it didn't put a strain on my spine or hips the way that sitting up in a meditation seat did.

4. Add Music

Sound is a super powerful element that you can add to your meditation practice. Meditation is about entering into a trance-like state, and music can help you get there. Meditation music in general is soothing and relaxing, but there are other types of sound like rhythmic drums, certain frequencies, and bilateral music that help put us into trance-like states and therefore deepen our meditation.

5. Focus on the Present Possibilities

A lot of people who aren’t practiced meditators have “tried it before and it didn't work for them,” assuming that it won’t work now for them. If you’re coming back to this habit with that story, open yourself to the possibilities! We are self-fulfilling prophecies. If we don’t believe it’s going to work, it won’t. Let go of the past and look to what is possible today. Today is a different day. You are a different person than you were the last time you meditated.

Every meditation practice is different. Sometimes it’s easy to settle in, but sometimes our minds are going a million miles an hour. The more you practice and show up, the deeper you can go and the easier it gets. You can be an experienced meditator and still have practices where it’s a struggle to quiet your mind, so don’t give up if you have a challenging meditation session.

6. Start Small

Set yourself up for success by making your meditation habit achievable. When I first started practicing consistently, I meditated three times a week for 5 to 10 minutes each time. Now I go for 20 minutes or more, but starting out with just 5 short minutes felt like a long time in the beginning! You don’t have to take a ton of time when you’re first starting out—just give yourself a few minutes of deep breathing and meditation to start your day, and before you know it you’ll find yourself going for longer.

7. Meditate in the Morning

New habits are most successful if we do them in the morning because we have more willpower in the morning. Willpower is a finite resource, so if we wait until the end of the day then typically we run out of it, and that means the habit doesn't get completed. Meditating in the morning can also really make a difference through the rest of your day!

That being said, if the evening or night time is the best time for your practice, don’t go against what works for you! A meditation in the evening to transition from work into relaxation has been incredibly powerful for my own routine and also right before bed to deepen my sleep.

Getting Started with Meditation

If your monkey mind just won’t quit, you’ve struggled to make meditation a habit on your own, or simply don’t know where to start, I’d love to invite you to join my group program this fall and winter! This program is designed for beginner to intermediate meditators, and in it I will teach you a wide array of focal and breathwork techniques - giving you the tools you need to deepen your meditation practice.

This program will run October 11 - December 8. Learn more here!